is this love or much more than that..

I have never been one of those girls who plan their lives around a guy. Not that I have not been in love, just that I never felt like doing that. One of the most noticeable and often irritating habits of mine is that I do things because I want to do those things and not because I should. My focus has always and always been to look for things that I like doing, find my calling in life and my often overrated, heading nowhere so-called career.

With you around, even before i could notice, all that took a back seat. To put it in your terms, I lost focus. Yes, indeed! Believe me, I never intended or planned it to be like this, it just happened even before I could take control of it.

The feeling of getting carried away by emotions has always intrigued me. So when you asked me why do I like you, I thought of so many things about you but could not really say anything. But then I thought to myself - there has to be something about him that makes me have a great day at college even after spending the entire night thinking about him, something that makes walking through the metro station as if I am flowing, miss my station because i was too busy relating the songs being played on my phone to my life.. I cant define this love for him in terms of his physical appearance, his intellectual ability, his weird sense of humor, his cute little jokes for me... Its just the feeling of him being around, makes me feel complete.. Its like there is nothing other than his presence that I would want from this world..

This feeling, this very feeling is like the early morning breeze.. Listening to your voice is like morning sunshine in the month of December.  I feel closer to you on days you are not around, thinking about things you do and everything that you say.  I have no clue what this is, but the joy of meeting you is out of this world..

There is so much that I want to tell you and so much more that I want to do for you but this world just wont let me because I am supposed act sane, do things that an educated civilized girl is expected to and of course, as you said think and act practically.

Thanks a bunch for interrupting my cake walk and opening my eyes to this dark, unfair world. Thanks for reminding me that I have a bigger purpose in life, though it will take me a while before I connect the dots and find an order and a meaning to this random sequence of events.

happy birthday krishi :)

When I sat down to write about you, I could not do much but just think. It feels good to use adjectives to define certain attributes of people but in your case, I just went blank..

I started with flipping the pages of our precious collection of photo albums. It was an amazing recollection of the memories, of all the things that you do for us and of the happiness that you bring into our lives. Looking back at those moments was an experience that cannot be put into words. And, this made me realize that there is no word that can epitomize the love that you have for us. You define the word MOM. Happy birthday mommy :)

You are our superhero!! Love you Krishi :)

Dhoom 3 - the Pout Movie

So whats the whole hullabaloo about this one??? Is it the perfectionist Aamir Khan, is it the sexy Katrina Kaif or is it - this is a family business and we cannot really chuck you out - Uday Chopra and Abhishek Bachchan? No brownie points for guessing because its neither of the above mentioned reasons..

It is the thing called marketing and pure marketing. And how??

The music videos are not released and are kept in wraps to keep the audience guessing. Well, it might be termed as the latest movie marketing technique but in this case that is all the movie was about and had the videos been released earlier, there wouldn't be much left to watch out for.

The first half of the movie might be mistaken to be a Rohit Shetty Tollywood'sh movie with a little lesser budget. Why? Because there were automobile stunts, the only difference being that this time the automobile was our very own desi auto rickshaw.. Come on Adi, you could have paid them a little more..

If that is so, why would an actor like Aamir Khan choose to do such a movie? "I do not choose movies, I choose scripts" well, I will have to give a benefit of doubt for some really cool dialogues and the chor - police game which is all about the loser police chasing the mighty chor and watching his stunts awestruck and dumbfounded. I wish a little attention had been paid to the robbery execution and not just the biking stunts. Oh yes biking!! the movie has some really cool biking stunts and why not, how would you promote the BMW bikes otherwise.. I just hope the Chicago Police does not sue Yashraj Films for showing them so loser like..

And, how can I miss Katrina Kaif, the marketing guys' latest tool. The 'kamli' song will definitely take the audience by storm. Brilliant acrobatics and amazing performance. But wait, is that all that Katrina Kaif is about? I thought this was the chance for her to go from "Boom to Dhoom" but unfortunately it did not happen. We all know she is much more than just a marketing gimmick and its high time she started showing some substance rather than being just a dancing doll.

Its good that Uday Chopra has started looking for a job in other professions, perhaps Abhishek Bachchan should take a leaf from his book.

If you're still wondering whats with the title.. Well, pouting seems to be the way to perform action stunts , be it Aamir Khan or Abhishek Bachchan.. or maybe they have been attending a lot many page 3 parties of late..

Watch it if you are a hard core bollywood fan with songs and actors dancing around, so-called entertainment (please do not throw pop corns at Abhishek Bachchan), some really good cinematography and of course, Katrina Kaif. With such a recipe, the movie is likely to score a home run at the box office!!

All in all, it was all-show-and-no-go!! To wrap up, all I can say is - I missed you Hrithik.

is it the time that passes or is it us

I am an avid reader. I do not read a specific genre of books, neither do I have a list of favorite authors. Reading any random stuff is like feeding my thoughts.

With the onset of winter, I replace my summer clothes in wardrobe with winter clothes and its usually the only time when I clean my closet. I generally use newspapers as shelf covers. Replacing the old newspapers with new ones is like an activity that happens twice in an year. Last month, while doing this daunting task, I came across an article in the old newspaper which was about 6 months old and I could actually recall the last time when I had read that article. That is when this thought struck my mind - is it the time that has passed or is it me? That newspaper article is still there but I have lived for 6 more months.

Just change the point of reference from the time to yourself. The world has always been there, no matter whether in a primitive form like the nebula or in a developed state as it is today. It is us who move towards the end...

Rockstar unleashed!

Can't believe I just watched Rockstar! Reason? Well, it was not what I had expected it to be. But what I went through in those two and a half hours was stupendous. It was nothing like an Imtiaz Ali movie, rather it was way beyond that. With this, he has entered into a new arena and has added a new genre to the world of movies.

Socha na tha, Jab we met, Love aaj kal are some of his greatest works. The audience applauded the work and he became the generation next filmmaker. But what I fail to understand is whether he himself was satisfied with his creations. I don't think so. Because Rockstar has completely transcended new heights. I cannot say if it will be a box office super hit, but it has definitely scored a home run in thinker's game.

The movie opens with an intriguing story between a "seedha sadha" hinduite, Janardan Jakhar (Ranbir) and a sophisticated stephenian, Heer (Nargis) who go on a maddening stroll to discover each other's wild side. From watching films like "Junglee Jawani" to drinking "desi thara", from crazy bike rides to dirty dancing, they do it all to celebrate Heer's bachelorhood of few months before she gets married to a hot shot in Prague.  And as always, they fall for each other and even contemplate to run away on the wedding day. And this part, this decision of what is right/wrong was the highlight of the movie. Running away is wrong, but marrying a person  you don't love is right. These are the so called regulations of this society.. Heer goes on to marry this prague guy and JJ continues to struggle to find his way to become an artist. Roaming through the streets of Delhi, from Hazrat Nizamuddin to old Delhi and then through CP. Eventually, he discovers his inner voice which was required to become an artist. A music company's contract, fame, money, he has them all. And yet, there was no feeling of fulfillment. And on the other end, Heer is diagnosed with some fatal disease. Both of them missed that spark, that wild factor. But they could not be together as they are inhabitants of an organized society.

My view : It is all about de-conditioning. Rules and regulations are made to keep things in order. As kids, we are taught about various rights and wrongs. But what we are not taught is that once you have a steady head, unlearning is the way to learn. From this point, decisions should no longer be weighed as right/wrong, provided you have a steady mind!

Life always "appears" to be faster in the other lane!

Today, on my way back home, I practically swapped sides and implemented "grass always looks greener on the other side". I always understood the meaning of this saying but never got a chance to see it happen.

While driving through South extension, I usually keep to the right lane to avoid the market rush. For the past one week, I was beginning to realize that the middle lane was smoother than the right one. Just like a normal human being, today I thought of shifting to the middle lane from the right one. And woohoo! My car was sailing on the road. It was a smooth, delightful ride which is a luxury in rush hours. No braking, no shifting to second gear from the third and then moving to first. My feet were dancing on the accelerator and my palms were resting on the wheel. But my happiness was short lived. At a distance of few meters, I saw that an SUV had broken down. And this "apparently" good looking lane had turned into an awful sight. You guessed it right! The right one was as smooth as ever.

And came the learning. There is much more to things than what we see. One has to be in that situation in order to be its judge. We have a zillion possibilities in front of us, but whatever culminates into real situations is perfectly balanced. If not today, then maybe tomorrow. So if you are looking forward to enjoy a bowl full of cherries in an "apparently" better lane of life, be prepared to taste the sour ones too. 

a second chance

Quite often used statement "life always gives you a second chance", it does, indeed. And before you start recalling all kinds of life saving incidents that might have happened with you and changed your life for good, let me tell you nothing of that sort happened with me. Its a plain and simple incident, but the learning is remarkable.

Everyday I spend good four hours in travel. Using various modes of transport, ranging from private to public, my travel is a potpourri of almost everything, be it the people, the areas, the infrastructure and yes, my own thoughts. Call it the height of my optimism or the adaptive human nature, these four hours are the best hours of my day.

One of the most important part of my journey is the Delhi Metro. Today, while rushing to catch the train when I reached the platform, the train was just about to leave. Just like any other sane person, I did not step in as the doors were in the process of closing. So I just stood there waiting for the digital meter to display the time left for the next train to arrive. At the same time, I started thinking of ways to utilize this waiting time. First thought was reading "I have a dream" and the other thought was that of a calf muscle workout (weird it may sound, but yes i do it :P). Before I could weigh the two options, something made me turn around. And guess what! The train was right there with doors open as if calling me to embrace. Happy as ever, I got in :)

So whatever we do, we might not taste success in the first go. But we get a number of opportunities to do it, we just have to turn around at the right moment. If you are not able to make it at first, do not call it a failure. Rather, add one more step to the whole process :)